Brain currently booting in Safe Mode

Technology will make your life easier, they said...

2026-03-05T12:37:16Z

...until it doesn't.

Had a brief bit of panic this morning. All I wanted to do was check my dang bank balance. Tried last night using the app on my phone, got an error. Spouse tried the same app from his phone, got in. It was late, I was tired, so I left it until this morning.

Got the same error.

No worries, thinks I, maybe someone got into my account and changed the password? Try to change the password, and get THE SAME FRIGGEN ERROR. Now panic is starting to set in, so I decide to check the other bank app I have on my phone, and it tells me that it can't get out to the wider world. Confused, I look at the top left of the screen and finally notice that I'm on network, not on wifi. (My plan is talk-and-text only, no data.)

Well, fuck me.

Get my phone back to recognizing the wifi signal that originates less than a metre from where I'm sitting, and NOW it works, ticketybo. Both apps, balances all checked.

Tech, man. Can't live with it, pass the beer nuts.

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Under

2026-02-26T12:26:35Z

My ears are plugged.

Not a little, not one yet the other is clear, both, both are plugged. It started yesterday. When I woke up, only one ear was stuffed, and the other was fine. Over the course of the day, both plugged up and then got entrenched that way. I had hoped that I could sleep off, if not both, then one to clear up.

NOPE.

Having my ears stuffed up often happens when I have a cold. I have a day or two of it, then it starts to clear through a series of gentle fizzy pops (like a sink full of dissipating bubbles but dry). This time, I have had no joy, and the problem seems to be compounding instead of alleviating.

I am not in any pain, it's more discomfort. My hearing is no bueno and that's the most frustrating part. Everything is muffled, like I'm wearing noise-cancelling headphones (the big ones that cover the entire ear) or underwater. Some pitches are painful, especially if sustained (like they are in music). I have the sneaking suspicion that if I put on my own pair of noise-cancelling headphones, I would hear nothing. That might be worth exploring at some point today. Or not; with only partial hearing, I feel isolated enough as it is.

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Ugh

2026-02-21T14:16:37Z

I have been under the weather for a week now. I had hoped that this virus would be both mild and short.

Apparently, that hope was misplaced.

I got it from my kid (because Sharing is Caring!), who spent most of the previous week home from school, partially on account of an over-abundance of caution, and partially because he was quite ill. But he did bounce back and was well enough for one day last week, so yay!

As for me, my sinuses are stuffed, one ear feels plugged whilst the other feels clear, and I am continually amazed at the sheer amount of snot that the human body can produce. My nose is red and raw, and I can easily go through 100+ tissues in a day. Oh, and the eardrum in my clear ear is itchy. No idea if that's possible, but it feels that way and it's fucking annoying. *grump*

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One of these things is not like the other.

2026-02-05T13:05:10Z

I have my yearly-ish dental appointment today. A cleaning/x-rays/exam isn't the worst thing, I know, and yet I would much rather have a PAP smear. From one, I just get *meh*. And from the other? A heaping helping of anxiety.

I'll let you work out which one is which.

If there's time after my appointment, I may hit up the grocery store that's in the same plaza for a few things for lunch. And maybe a coffee. And a donut. Because after a visit to the dentist, who doesn't need a little treat?

EDIT: My appointment has been moved to March as my hygienist is sick. THIS SUITS ME FINE.

The only downside to having dental anxiety is this: despite the change of date, I still need to come down from the anxiety I am already experiencing. Today was going to be a wash with the appointment, and it's still going to be a wash without that appointment. Fun, wow.

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valkryor @ 2026-01-21T16:21:00

2026-01-21T21:21:54Z

I am supposed to be waiting for my kid whilst he's at a speech language appointment right now. Instead, I am sitting in front of my laptop, *this close* to tears.

Last week, I was told that the SLP needs to see the boy in person, as there are some sounds she's not certain he's making correctly over Zoom. And I get it, I do; technology can only take you so far, and there's always going to be a level of interference that is not present in person. Fine, thinks I, I can make this work. Bussing in, my usual mode of transport, is no bueno, as it's at least an hour one way with too much waiting time when the weather is this shitty. Since I can get reimbursed for transport, I opt for a cab.

Call the cab company 45 minutes before the appointment, figuring that it will be MORE than enough time between the wait for the car and the drive there to make it, even when the roads are less than great (as they are now). After 35 minutes of waiting, and already knowing that the drive is going to be longer than usual, I call the cab company and cancel the ride, not one minute before the cab arrives, far too late to be of any use to us.

I did everything right and still managed to fuck everything up.

I emailed the SLP and completely expect to be charged for the appointment as a late cancellation. It's only fair. So now I'm going to go get my coffee made and try to warm up and not feel so fucking useless at life.

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valkryor @ 2026-01-12T13:09:00

2026-01-12T18:09:59Z

I tried to come up with a clever title, but everything I wrote just kept getting worse and worse. It even veered into I-am-14-and-this-is-deep territory. And while I can still remember some parts of being 14, I am well and truly beyond my teenage years and decided that no subject line was better than self-important drivel.

I have been sleeping in a thumb brace/spica for a couple of weeks. I don't know if it's helping, per se, but it's also not making it worse. I guess I live in this status quo of having hands that sometimes will not work with me and sometimes will. Yay?

I am still looking for work, but applying? That's where I tend to fall a ~~lot~~ little flat. I threw my hat in the ring for a data entry desk job just before making this post. I am not going to hold my breath on anything resembling a response, because that's how my luck tends to run. (I adhere to the adage that if it weren't for bad luck, I'd have no luck at all.) I think the saddest part is that the job itself pays minimum or just above, which is more than I have been paid at any job. So that's fucking depressing.

I did run out to do a couple of quick errands this morning. First was to Bulk Barn, where I bought exactly what was on my mental list, minus something that was in stock online, but not in store. One thing I wanted to pick up was popcorn seasoning. I scooped out some sour cream and onion into one bag, and dill pickle into another. When I checked my receipt, I had managed to snag the same of each. Considering I wasn't really measuring that carefully, I'm kind of impressed with myself.

Then I wandered into a local fabric store that's going out of business and walked out with nothing. Even with 50% off, everything was still so damned expensive. For what I'm looking for, I can find it cheaper - at regular price - from the other fabric store, no sale required.

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Reading List 2026

2026-01-11T15:27:53Z

I have discovered that a constant stream of political dumb shitfuckery is a detriment to my desire to read. Last year, I only managed to read 45 books and did very little writing. I can only hope that this year will be better.

January:

Strange Love - Ann Aguirre (reread)
Somewhere Beyond the Sea - TJ Klune (bad decisions book club)
A Werewolf's Guide to Seducing a Vampire - Sarah Hawley

February:

The Next Best Fling - Gabriella Gamez
Magic Kingdom for Sale--Sold! - Terry Brooks (reread)
Black Unicorn - Terry Brooks (reread)

March:

A Gentleman's Gentleman - TJ Alexander
Remarkably Bright Creatures - Shelby Van Pelt
The Lily of Ludgate Hill - Mimi Matthews

( Notes, rants, and recommendations behind the curtain... )

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Handy Update

2025-12-14T15:51:56Z

I've had my appointment, and now I have one in the new year for an ultrasound and x-ray for my right hand. My doc could feel some inflammation at the base of the thumb, and imagining is necessary to determine the cause. Until then, I need to wear a thumb spica (a type of brace) when I sleep. The only downside is having to take it off in the middle of the night because I need to pee so I can wash my hands after. I was also told to do less, but as I already baby my hands, less at this point equates to damn near nothing.

So keep on keepin' on, I guess. :P

But the handy fun doesn't stop there. Oh, no, there is no stopping the fun train. No, sir.

For a bit of personal history, I have struggled with eczema on my hands for almost four decades. It's come and gone, swapping the fingers on my right hand when I was thirteen for the side of the same hand just below the pinky finger. When I was a child, it was bad. BAD bad: fluid bubbles, cracked and flaking skin, bleeding fissures, itchiness to the point of pain. It took a change in my diet to get it to quiet down and disappear. One of the triggers was chocolate.

Do you have any idea how upsetting it was to go through an Easter WITHOUT chocolate? I do.

Lately, it's been triggered by stress and exacerbated by winter. I keep my hands moisturized as best I can and have medicated cream when things get bad. In short, it's manageable. Even when a spot appeared on my left knee a few years back, I kept calm and carried on.

Now, there is a new spot, one that I am NOT okay with: my ring finger.

For a while, I had been wearing my engagement ring in lieu of a wedding ring because I don't wear it enough and it fit, though a little small. I started getting itchy under the ring and noticed tiny familiar fluid bubbles. After trying to battle it and it not getting better, I switched back to a faceted silver band that is the correct size. And for a while, everything was fine.

Until it wasn't.

This morning, I noticed that my ring finger was hella itchy, so I pulled up my ring and started scratching long enough to put the pieces together. I stopped and looked at the skin and yep, pinpoint holes indicating scratched open fluid bubbles. MOTHERFUCKER. *sigh*

So I put the ring in my jewellery box and will treat this for a bit until it clears up again. If it keeps happening, I might have to give up on wearing a wedding ring, at least on my left hand, as I have no interest in turning this small flare into a permanent finger of eczema. Been there, done that. NEVER AGAIN.

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Catch These Fists

2025-11-27T15:09:35Z

My hands, y'all, my hands suck.

For far longer than I should have, I have dealt with decreasing grip strength and bouts of pain. Is it an RSI? Maybe. Is it arthritis? Possibly. Is it fucking annoying? DEFINITELY.

I have to pace myself when I have a lot of sewing as so many of those actions hurt after anywhere from five minutes to an hour depending on the task. Usually crochet isn't too bad and doesn't require a day of rest between working on something. Now? Yeah, that's a no from me, dog. I'm not even going to attempt any knitting for the same reasons. Oh, and typing this today? Uncomfortable, which is a new one on me.

I have an appointment week after next and will have to take it easy for the next few days. As a stay-at-home-parent, this does not fill me with joy, because I feel that I have to justify not working by, well, working. And what does the work require? THE USE OF MY HANDS. *cries* At least there are leftovers for dinner tonight.

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valkryor @ 2025-11-10T08:25:00

2025-11-10T13:25:08Z

No shiny new job for me.

While the interview was good, it was not enough.

C'est la vie.

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The week that was...

2025-11-03T22:53:13Z

Usually, one reckons a week going from Sunday to Saturday, or even Monday to Sunday. Mine is going from Tuesday last week to today. And it's been a week, I tell you what.

On Tuesday, we all got double-jabbed for fluVID after the kiddo got home from school. Not unusual, but it's good that it's done and I can now relax a little bit regarding whatever respiratory silliness that's going around.

Wednesday morning started with a message from one of the jobs I had applied to, asking if was available to interview by phone the next day. Why yes, yes I was available, thanks for asking. That squared away, I took it easy for the rest of the day because my arm was aching like someone had used it for bare-knuckle boxing practice. I also decided that today was the day to make the switch from Windows to Linux for so many reasons. So many.

The phone interview on Thursday was... meh. It wasn't stellar, wasn't horrid, just there. There was a bit of an accent barrier, and Beans was chewing on my toes because he could. It was exceedingly distracting and I was certain that would be the end of that. (This is fine, because whilst I am looking, I'm also realistic enough to know that a sixteen year gap is a LOT for most companies to take the risk.)

Friday, a call came in from the company, asking me to come in on Monday for an in-person interview. I'm flummoxed, but agree as one of us needs to work if we want to continue our lifestyle of paying rent and eating food whilst living paycheque-to-paycheque.

At it as also Hallowe'en and D was uninterested in going out and scoring candy, I made cheeseburgers for dinner, and we had waffles and a thematically appropriate ice cream for dessert. We deemed Declan old enough and watched The Thing as we ate. When that was over, I showed them the Honest Trailer of the same. All-in-all, it was a good evening.

Saturday, I gamed with my D&D group. We were online due to circumstances outside of our control. This is where I discovered that while the switch between operating systems was fairly painless in most respects, Discord was being a little brat and needed a lot of finessing. We limped along with substandard play until after lunch. My kid, who had made the switch months ago, told me what he did to make Discord behave. I did the same during the lunch break and voila! Success without college. The rest of the game continued as it usual did.

Yesterday was quiet. The only thing of note was a fit-check on my good clothes, in case I needed to make an emergency purchase. I have not needed event appropriate clothes in over a decade, so I was delighted to discover that they fit well-enough to be serviceable. I also read a charming romance that made me cry. It even started with a meet-cute over body bags. It's lovely and warm with an animator and a mortician figuring out how they fit together for their HEA.

Today.

Today, for the first time in almost two decades, I had an honest-to-goodness grown-up job interview. Yes, I was nervous, but I don't think I made too much of an ass of myself. One of the interviewers was impressed that not only was "First Contact Resolution" on my resume, but I also know what it means. I think I made a good impression? I have a lot of tech experience/expertise, and I'm used to monotonous work, so who the fuck knows? I certainly do not. I lost the ability to tell if it went well forever ago. :P

Instead of stressing, I came home and baked a cake, which seemed a better use of my time.

This week has been a bit of a whirlwind and I'm tired. I'm going to go check on my dinner and get ready to eat, complete with gingerbread for dessert.

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That Time of Year Again.

2025-07-29T21:02:33Z

I have trouble believing that it's been twenty years since we lost Shannon.

TWENTY. YEARS.

It doesn't feel like that much time has passed by, and yet, here we are. We brought her flowers, like we do (or try to do) every year. This year's bunch is the best yet:

We ran a few errands afterwards, for boring adult things like milk and bread. In the driveway, parked next to our spot, was a car with the most unfortunate tire name I have ever seen:

And yes, I chuckled. At my core, I have the sophisticated humour of a twelve year old boy, and this kind of shit will never NOT be funny.

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Human Animals

2025-07-27T01:07:41Z

Night before last, there was an EPIC ruckus in the apartment above ours at 5am. I'm talking "bodies hit the floor" level of ruckus, here, not "cat jumping down from high places" thumps. It was someone throwing a tantrum at the very least, and possibly domestic violence at worst. In any case, it looked, for all the world, that person(s) took their Big Feelings outside and directed it at the garden.

I noticed that one of the hostas near the back door was torn out/up when we were taking Beans to the vet for his last round of vaccines. (Beans continue to be adorable, but is a thorn in Sunny's side. As much as I want them to be cuddle/play buddies, I have little hope that it will happen any time soon, if ever.)

Yes, it could have been an animal, but it felt very human to me.

Tonight, I replanted the hosta in a new location (it had extensive roots and it's been raining and will continue to do so and hostas are pretty damned resilient - it will be okay), away from whichever dipshit decided to destroy it in the first place. I cleaned up the torn leaves, pulled a couple of invasive thistles (my own personal bugbear) and am hot and sweaty. It's not all that hot out there, but it IS hella humid.

It's not a big garden, and I can only do so much given the lack of tools/money to do a proper job of it, and what it needs is extensive. I'm not even being compensated for my labour as it is; I do this to make me happy. But replanting a hosta? This, this I can do.

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valkryor @ 2025-06-22T08:37:00

2025-06-22T12:37:29Z

I woke up sick. Whee!

It doesn't feel like anything major, and yet being unwell during a heat wave is the epitome of awful. Going to drink lots of tea and not do much for the next few days.

Sunny and Beans. Beans wants to play with his cat-shaped friend so badly, and Sunny wants nothing to do with him. I play with Beans as often as I can to wear him out, but he always gravitates back to the other cat. Sunny is jealous that I don't pay 100% of my attention to him anymore; he's an aloof cat who maybe wants 30 minutes spread out through the day. That's it.

I guess now that I'm not available on his schedule is the root of his turning into a grumpy old man, but he can adapt to it just like he needs to adapt to Beans.

Beans continues to be a delight. He does, though, get into things he should not (typical kitten behaviour), so there's a lot of redirection going on around here, including redirection back to a toy and away from Sunny.

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Kitten!

2025-06-09T12:29:03Z

So. Last week, we were dumb.

This is Beans. He was adopted from the Humane Society on Thursday. He's 2 months old and so very wee. We took him to the vet on Friday to a) get him registered, and b) get his left eye checked out, since it was red-rimmed and leaking (his eye is fine - no scratches and we have drops that are clearing up whatever irritation he had). On Saturday, we went and splashed out on a new cat tree as our previous one was at least eight years old. (Beans was asleep on top of the condo until I spoke to him. Now he wants cuddles.)

He is full of kitten-y mischief, like going behind the stove and into the warming drawer. Exhibit A:

Sunny is warming up to him. It's a process, but there hasn't been aggression. He has hissed, growled, swatted once that I saw (and only one time), and has found places to be that Beans cannot get to. It's been more of, "Go away, kid, you bother me," and less, "I must defend my home from invaders." Beans wants to play with his new cat-shaped friend SO BADLY, but Sunny isn't there yet. I observe their interactions, but will only interfere if it gets dangerous; Beans needs to learn that the older cat has some very reasonable boundaries and won't if I'm constantly pulling them apart.

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Some Advice (and a Recommendation)

2025-05-17T13:41:18Z

Uh, Murderbot? SecUnit? YOU NEED THERAPY. While your inorganic parts are running as optimal as ever, it's your squishy human bits that need some love. After everything you've been through, your PTSD is showing. Get some help, or I'll ask ART to sit on you. No hugs, because you don't like/want to be touched, but you're worrying your humans and that has to stop now.

(So many of us identify with Murderbot: it's just doing its best, you know? And it's often surprised that humans want it around and value more than just its processing speed and security protocols. Emotions are hard, okay?)

Also, go watch the show. It's pretty great and is hitting all the right beats, even if "it's not the same as the book" it has the feel of them. And of course it's not the same! It can't be! What I imagine when I read is not what the author, Martha Wells, imagined when she put down the words, and it won't be what the showrunners imagined when they started the heavy lifting of translating text-to-visual. The special effects are top notch, Corporation Rim is as awful as you expect, and the acting is superb. Like SecUnit (who often wonders what it's doing with its face) I don't know if Alexander Skarsgård knows what he's doing with his face (and if he does, he's conveying that "not knowing" perfectly).

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Bullet Points!

2025-05-01T20:17:28Z

Some things:

I had a dental appointment today, a cleaning and exam. I got told that I should be going more often - every six months instead of every nine - and I declined. Yes, I can go twice a year, get in two cleanings and one exam, OR I can not push my dental anxiety anymore than I already do. My last appointment - three small fillings - was fucking traumatic, and cleanings are bad enough as it is. Yes, I should go more often, but I will not. Paying for mental torment is no kink of mine, thanks ever so much.

I think Sunny is lonely. He's been super affectionate lately and has dug out his favourite springs so we can play fetch, something he hasn't done in over a year. The spouse isn't ready for another cat, but only having one just doesn't sit right with me. Will we get a second (and possibly third) cat? Yes. When will this happen? *shrugs* I have no fucking clue.

We continue to be precariously housed. It is...not a great situation to be in. There's a lot of "hurry up and wait" and the uncertainty is a mill stone on my chest.

My reading and writing have fallen off the face of the planet. My brain has not been kind and there has been more than enough nonsense to distract me from the things that I love. Hell, even my crochet and knitting projects have been languishing lately.

To that end, I started something I consider a "mindless" crochet project. The pattern is simple, doesn't require counting, and is a number of two-row repeats. I was gifted some yarn and decided that it would make a nice scarf. It wasn't enough, which is fine, so I dug in my stash to find a very similar colour to finish it off. It wasn't enough again, which is less fine; I have one row left.

So I went to my stash, hoping to find a cream or off-white that would work with not just this scarf but the second one I started today (a just started project is much more public transportation friendly than an almost finished one) and came up empty. I have a lot of different colours, lots of different weights in two garbage bags, an underbed bin, and two tote bags, AND NO CREAM. I need to buy yarn so I can finish these. *le sigh*

It is cold and wet out there, but I have tea and a cozy sweater and comfy pants.

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Over the Rainbow (Bridge)

2025-04-14T20:07:34Z

We had to say goodbye to Sheldon today.

I thought he was going to get better, but he was steadily going downhill since I posted last. He could no longer stand, was throwing up old blood, and couldn't regulate his temperature. It was time.

He was a good soft boi. Very orange, much fluffy, purred easily, but never caught the red dot. He tried and yet it eluded him his entire life. I will miss him, and I will even miss the constant need to be perched on my shoulder like an unintentional parrot. I will not miss his stinky poops, though.

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Bits of Bobs

2025-04-11T14:18:05Z

More things:

At the end of February, I had a doctor's appointment (mostly to meet my new doctor as well as get a necessary follow-up ultrasound that was supposed to happen in January). On the way to catch my bus (that I missed), I slipped on some black ice. I thought I had only wrenched it a little, walked to another bus stop (different route) about ten minutes away, caught my transfer, then had to walk from that stop to the office down hill where the footing was not great.

At the end of March, I discovered that I did not simply "wrench my knee a little", but actually twisted it. My chiropractor set everything back to rights and it's been slowly healing. I've already been through this particular song-and-dance, so I know that it will be months before it's back to something resembling normal. Sweet Baby Christ in a minivan, if I could go back in time to counsel my younger self, I would tell her to take care of her knees, 'cause this? This is some bullshit.

Sheldon had a bit of downturn with lots of diarrhea multiple times a day. Not only was it super gross and hella stinky, it was also worrying. So I called the vet, got him in on Tuesday. She didn't like the feel of Sheldon's intestines, calling them "ropy" and suggested an ultrasound. They do it in-house, with a tech coming in soon. As it turned out, "soon" meant Wednesday or Thursday. We also got some medication to help with the runny poops.

I made arrangements to get him in on Wednesday, as I could fit it in after taking my kid to his orthodontic appointment. I also had to dose him with gabapentin two hours before bringing him in. That was both comical and/or horrifying to watch this elderly cat try to do anything while under the influence.

The vet is fairly certain that Sheldon has something called triaditis, which is three organs all acting up at the same time, those being the pancreas (pancreatitis), the small intestines (inflammatory bowels), and the liver (cholangiohepatitis). The only way to determine if it's something more sinister is with a biopsy, and putting a very ill, seventeen-year old cat under anesthesia really does NOT sit well with me. We're going to be giving him steroids, which is the best treatment option at this point.

We continue to be under an eviction notice and are now waiting for the new hearing date (we're trying to get all of us represented by one hearing instead of multiple ones for practically the same paperwork). Not gonna lie, this is more bullshit.

I have been looking for, and failing at, finding work. While I am unsurprised, given my fifteen year job gap, it still blows chunks.

Even with all of this uncertainty, life continues to happen. We even splashed out on a new mattress and box spring because we are over waking up sore and did not do so last year. (Our current mattress and box spring were bought last century and do not owe us a damn thing at this point.)

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I made a thing!

2025-03-24T13:36:00Z

Okay, it's not exciting or even all that pretty, but it is functional, which is what really matters. Some background: last week, we bought a new microwave. Our previous one was dying - overheating and shutting off, lacklustre performance, &c - and I was keeping it unplugged unless we needed to use it because I am fucking paranoid about house fires.

What I used to do was keep a bunch of baking stuff on top of the microwave. (Yes, I know. This might have shortened its life, but it's done now.) What I didn't do was pile the same stuff on top of the new one. I built a shelf instead.

I had to borrow a skill saw and get a short piece of scrap 2x4 from a friend, but I had a piece of 3/4 plywood that was taking up space in the coat closet and was a nuisance every time the door was opened more than a hand's width. I need to get my hands on a really thin cutting mat from the dollar store to replace the towel I have in place now, but that should be the only monetary cost. The only downside is the cord for the microwave is very taut. It's not pulling, but there's ZERO slack. I would be happier with a little slack, but c'est la vie.

My baking stuff is accessible whilst being out of the way, and the microwave is up a bit, which makes it easier to see inside/clean. And I wore the sexy combination of bike shorts, (sort of) compression socks, and combat boots. WOO!

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valkryor @ 2025-02-28T09:25:00

2025-02-28T14:25:26Z

*heavy sigh*

Why are people so stupid?

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Over It.

2025-02-19T12:32:19Z

I am over Feckless Ford and this current government. That he's still leading in the polls is so confusing because he is and has been a TERRIBLE PREMIER. And Ontarians want more of this? Sweet Baby Christ in a minivan, I can't even with the delulu.

So I made a thing. Five things, actually, and you have my permission to share them far and wide. We need him out and not another four years of his unfettered nonsense.

Thanks, Doug.

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Aw, nuts.

2025-02-10T13:15:58Z

I am currently knitting my first pair of mittens for a friend (this same friend destashed his late mother's bags and bags and bags of yarn upon me, so it seemed like an even trade) and have completed the thumb! Okay, yes, it doesn't sound that exciting, but I had to learn a new skill (increases to the left and to the right) as well as adapt the pattern for how I knit, which is not how these mittens were intended to be worked up (in the round on double pointed needles vs in the flat and sewn up after).

After the thumb was thumbed, I thought that I should, you know, weave in my end because it is the one thing that I hate the most and this would get it over with quickly. I have a little case that I naalbound with all of my yarn needles and my naalbinding needles, some stitch markers and safety pins, and a foldable pair of scissors that I bought at SickKids when Shannon was in their care. I picked it up, thought it felt weird, but put that out of mind and opened it up and tipped it out.

Where the hell did all my needles go?

While I do still have two of my naalbinding needles (including the brass replica of an archaeological find gifted by my friend), the scissors and stitch markers and safety pins, I only have one yarn needle. What the actual fuck?

My best guess is this: I had taken my completed owlbear to Declan's orthodontics appointment last week because I had attached the legs unevenly and it made the entire piece wonky. I brought what I needed to take it off and then reattach one of the legs to make it look more even. (Side note: any handmade crochet stuffy is going to be a little wonky. It's the nature of the craft and part of the charm of the finished piece, but I digress.) Because I was working on something that required my needle case, I suspect that the others slid out when I wasn't paying attention and I left them behind in the waiting room. I did not notice that they were gone until yesterday and they weren't at the bottom of a bag temporarily misplaced.

This is more of a bummer than any kind of life altering loss. The needles have most likely been tossed into the trash, which is a tich frustrating because too many useful items get thrown out for no good reason. Ah, well. I will acquire more at some later point when I have the inclination and opportunity to do so.

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2025 is already fired.

2025-01-30T18:52:44Z

January is almost over. Another day and a half (or thereabouts) and it will be over. Yay.

So, some updates:

Sheldon - We had to take him back to the vet for more testing at the beginning of the month because the anti-nausea shot had worn off and he had started puking two or three times a day again. This time, it was blood work and urinalysis. I declined the abdominal ultrasound; he is old and it's expensive. We got some anti-nausea pills that day and then some painkillers the next day. In the end, between two vet visits and another scrip of PukesBeGone, I've spent about $1100. And for what? A flare up of pancreatitis. He has an upset tumtum, and I have a massive vet bill. UGH. (Yes, I know it's more than that, but the end result - too much puking - is the same.)

The kid is in exam week, but has no final exams. Because of the weather, exams have been postponed by two days, so the new term doesn't start until Wednesday of next week. The only good thing about this is that I won't have to get him out of school for his next orthodontic appointment.

Depression is kicking my ass. Often, this is a symptom of my meds not working as efficiently as they should. Because of a recent upping of the dosage last year having the required effect (quelling the hot flash anxiety spikes), and me able to do stuff, my guess is it's a reaction to everything else. As much as I like to know what's happening in the world around me, I don't think it's doing my mental health any favours. Time for a news diet, I think. And more Bob Ross. Happy little trees and happy accidents, here I come.

The microwave overheated last night when I was getting dinner sorted. This...does not fill me with joy. I unplugged it, cleaned the inside, wiped down the outside, and gave the cubby it sits in a once over. The cubby was the worst of it, which is impressive, considering how disgusting the insides of microwaves can get. Anyhoodle, plugged it into a plug that's on its own breaker, and it turned back on again. So yay? I put everything back, but declined to plug it in again. I have a healthy amount of paranoia regarding kitchen appliances spontaneously setting themselves on fire. If I need it, I will plug it in. If I do not, then it can stay unplugged.

I am still reading and writing. See above regarding depression for why everything is stalled or meh. The same is true of my crochet and knitting projects. Thanks brain, I hate it.

For those who don't follow the news, it has been confirmed, in stomach churning detail, what a massive dirt bag Neil Gaiman is. I was gutted and continue to be gutted, and now I have to figure out what I'm going to do with the MASSIVE AMOUNT OF BOOKS, COMICS, MOVIES, AND OTHER EPHEMERA that I've collected over the years. I know I won't be able to enjoy any of it until he's dead and buried, and so much of it was formative and meant so much to my younger self. I have two small shelves on a narrow bookcase jammed packed with my physical TBR pile. I think tomorrow I'm going to unpack it, dust the shelves, and pack as much Gaiman stuff as I can on them and move my TBR somewhere else. If I have to cover them so I don't have to look at his name on the spines, I have more than enough fabric for the job. I just don't feel good knowing that it's visible, you know?

( Putting this behind a cut because it's menstrual TMI. )

Okay. That's enough rambling. My lunch is ready (a Greek style omelette - eggs, fries, cheese - that I first had on Crete *mumblesomething* years ago) and I'm hungry.

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Reading List 2025

2025-01-04T14:19:42Z

I'm really enjoying keeping these lists with commentary of what I've been reading over the year. It keeps me somewhat organized and lets me track my thoughts.

I read 75 books last year. Not too shabby. Let's see if I can read more this year.

January:

The Earl's Holiday Wager - Theresa Romain
We'll Prescribe You a Cat - Syou Ishida (translated by E Madison Shimoda)
The Baron's Marriage Gamble - Theresa Romain
Agent to the Stars - John Scalzi
Ghost Station - SA Barnes
Thornhedge - T Kingfisher

February:

Earl's Trip - Jenny Holiday
The Duke at Hazard - KJ Charles
Witch King - Martha Wells
A Lady's Guide to Fortune-Hunting - Sophie Irwin

March:

The Spellshop - Sarah Beth Durst
The Beast Takes a Bride - Julie Anne Long
The Zombie Survival Guide - Max Brooks (reread)
Someone Perfect - Mary Balogh

April:

Til Death Do Us Bard - Rose Black
The Lady He Lost - Faye Delacour

May:

Murderbot Diaries - Martha Wells
- Compulsory (short story)
- All Systems Red (reread)
- Artificial Condition (reread)
- Rogue Protocol (reread)
- Exit Strategy (reread)
- home: habitat, range, niche, territory (short story, reread)
- Fugitive Telemetry (reread)
- Network Effect (reread)
- System Collapse (reread)
Tall, Duke, and Scandalous - Amy Rose Bennett
Demon's Guide to Wooing a Witch - Sarah Hawley

June:

Spirit Ring - Lois McMaster Bujold
Prince of Beasts - Lyonne Riley
Love is a Rogue - Lenora Bell

July:

Viscount in Love - Eloisa James
The Counterfeit Scoundrel - Lorraine Heath

August:

Behooved - M Stevenson
Zomromcom - Olivia Dade

September:

Sword of Destiny - Andrzej Sapkowski
Blood of Elves - Andrzej Sapkowski
Time of Contempt - Andrzej Sapkowski

October:

A Nobleman's Guide to Seducing a Scoundrel - KJ Charles
Baptism of Fire - Andrzej Sapkowski
Tower of Swallows - Andrzej Sapkowski
Lady of the Lake - Andrzej Sapkowski

November:

Morbidly Yours - Ivy Fairbanks
The Duke Gets Desperate - Diana Quincy
The Unbeatable Squirrel Girl: 2 Fuzzy, 2 Furious - Shannon Hale and Dean Hale

December:

The Apollo Murders - Chris Hadfield
Lovelight Farms - B K Borison

( Commentary this way... )

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