If it was me, in my weird obsessive list-making way I'd probably start by making myself a list of what needs to be done then start with the thing that's easiest or most important to me. When that's done I'd move on to the next thing that's easiest or most important to me. I'd take breaks as I need them, visit friends (or ask them to visit me), nap, eat, sleep as required and just be doing something, anything to keep my mind occupied.
Whatever feels right, which will take some time I'm sure for anything to feel right.
Spend the time with your hubby to move through this together, but get enough time to yourself too. I'm sure balance will be the key word here as everyone mourns differently.
Be selfish, do what you and your marriage needs. The world will just have to understand.
You've received a lot of advice so far. I'll just say that when I'm in situations of grief or shock, I as much as possible just try to stay busy. I don't know if that's healthy or not, but even going through life mechanically helps pass the hours little by little, and only time really helps. :(
Call when you need company. Many friends are waiting. Do what you want. You're more than welcome and allowed and capable. My recomendation is to do at least one stupid thing you would have never done before, because there was no time for it. Indulge.
now what.? you cry you feel normal you feel like your insides are being pushed through every pore of your body you rage you laugh you cry you see a bit of happiness you cry some more. eventually it gets less and less, but you still cry, you still laugh, you still rage. and you still love.
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onlyembers
no subject
Date: 2005-08-03 02:41 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-08-03 03:02 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-08-03 03:38 pm (UTC)Spend the time with your hubby to move through this together, but get enough time to yourself too. I'm sure balance will be the key word here as everyone mourns differently.
Be selfish, do what you and your marriage needs. The world will just have to understand.
no subject
Date: 2005-08-03 04:45 pm (UTC)Be alone when you need and with others when you need.
Cry, - a lot - and then some more. And put one foot in front of the other one until it no longer feels like you are wearing concrete boots.
no subject
Date: 2005-08-03 06:02 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-08-03 06:58 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-08-04 12:40 am (UTC)My recomendation is to do at least one stupid thing you would have never done before, because there was no time for it. Indulge.
no subject
Date: 2005-08-04 01:45 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-08-04 02:23 am (UTC)you cry
you feel normal
you feel like your insides are being pushed through every pore of your body
you rage
you laugh
you cry
you see a bit of happiness
you cry some more.
eventually it gets less and less,
but you still cry, you still laugh, you still rage.
and you still love.
love to you both.